Nobody Cares— Isn't That Beautiful?
I have a dirty friend.
She is the most amazing person you will ever meet.
She keeps everything, including the silly tin ashtray I got her in Denmark.
She has anything you need: picture frames, markers, clothes, a fart that makes you laugh.
She chose one of the most emotionally challenging careers and handles every day with a wide open heart, despite the sorrow around her.
She is one of the most selfless, caring individuals I’ve ever come across.
I have an organized friend.
She is the absolute vision of success.
She has a place for everything in her flat & a 4-page itinerary for any city you wish to visit.
She can plan a 10-day trip for 300 people in under 24 hours without breaking a sweat.
She followed her heart to a new location and has made it her home in a unique way.
She is beautiful from the inside out and welcoming to every person she meets.
I have a strong friend.
She can deadlift 225lb and swing a 36kg kettlebell like it’s made of feathers.
She has devoted her life to creating the strongest image of herself and helping those around her do the same.
She is mindful, spiritual, and reflective.
She is leading others down a path full of mobility and movement.
I have a friendly friend.
He is one of the most interesting people you'll ever meet, with a heart full of gold and a pocket full of acid.
He counts backwards from 100 when he’s stressed and can say any word backwards without giving it much thought.
He's always there to listen and roll joints while you vent.
He prioritizes friendship in a way I’ve never known before, going above & beyond to be there for me and for anyone else lucky enough to call him a pal.
When I think of these people my heart is filled with nothing but joy and comfort.
All I see are so many positive, shining attributes and all I feel is an overwhelming sense of gratitude they’re in my life.
Because they are humans, and humans are not just one thing.
We are not just our messy rooms or packing lists or instagram posts or gym PRs.
We are so many things compiled into one complex creature.
We are our obscurities and fears and insecurities. We are our talents and knowledge and experiences. We are our pink scars and dry skin and whitened smiles. We are our comforts and chaos of choice.
Human beings are fortunate enough to be able to think and feel.
It's important we are responsible with these abilities and use them to the best of our advantage: think positive to feel good.
I know they say life's all about the little moments, but it's cool to zoom out and remember all those little moments are just that...little! There is a grand picture in the making. That stupid thing you said last saturday? No one remembers. That pimple? Literally no one notices. That break up? People will stop talking about it in a week.
Whatcha' Thinking About?
We get so caught up in our own flaws and mistakes and situations, we never stop to consider just how little other people are thinking about them (if they even notice at all).
I don’t care that you have ash on your floor; I care that your door is always open for me. I don’t care that you get freaked out by paper mache; I care that you'll hop on a plane to come see me.
So why do I worry about if my house smells like dog when I host an impromptu party? Why am I embarrassed about the scar on my leg or the way my scalp is sometimes flaky or the way my stomach kinda folds over my shorts? Why do I overthink my words and actions and social media posts? Why do I worry so. damn. much. about what others are "saying"?
I know the truth is— people are too busy caring about their own "thing" to even give mine a second thought.
So the big question is: Why am I so concerned with how others perceive me?
I'm not here to say I've found an answer, but I do believe being bold enough to ask yourself the question can lead you down a path of enrichment and bring you to a better understanding of one of life's biggest mystery: yourself.
Taking A Step Back
My best response when I find myself overthinking what others are thinking (which sounds ridiculous when I see it written out) is to take a step back and remember that everyone is on this Earth just trying to live and love (and laugh hehe) — to enjoy themselves and one another. Everyone around me is trying to grow & go in whatever direction their heart is screaming. Everyone around me gets insecure, and anxious, and embarrassed, and worried, and sad. And everyone, EVERYONE, poops.
We all have our secret obsessions (cough cough Teen Mom) or rampant insecurities or less-than-ideal scenarios and we never really know what someone else is dealing with when we interact with them. We don’t know that they pull out their hair when they’re stressed or just lost their job or have unfolded laundry waiting at home. And, unless they tell us, we’ll never really know.
Because you don’t look at someone and immediately think of all their flaws and sufferings.
You look at someone and see their smile and the way they’re looking back at you. You look at someone you love and feel the home and friendship that exists between you two. You see someone helping their neighbor or changing their tire, and you don’t care what their hair looks like or that they're shoes are worn out or their car floor is filled with fast food wrappers, you just see them doing the most universal, attractive thing of all— living.
Once we realize that we are all trying to accomplish the same thing in our time here, we can accept that those little things we spend so much time worrying about don't play a large role in the grand scheme of things. Life is about living, whatever that may look like to you. The more time you spend worrying about what others are thinking about how you're doing it, the less time you have to enjoy it.
Use your time wisely because, really, no one cares :)